to my Asia

Dear Asia,

You left us at 5 am Arizona time, 4 am California time, and 10 pm Australia time on Friday February 24th, 2012. Mom said you were snuggled next to her and Wheezer, in your favorite bed. You lived a long and beautiful life of 15 years, and I am so happy that you are now free from any pain you may have felt in your old age. You were my best friend, and slept on my bed every night from age 10 to the end of high school, and every other time I was home after that. Whenever I could come home, where ever home was, you were there, ready to jump into my arms and lick my face. Even when you started to loose your sight and your hearing, you could smell me, and your ears would perk up when you sensed I was there. You were my baseline. Even when everything else had changed, you were there.

Thank you, Asia, for what you gave me, Mom, and Allie. You are the original fourth musketeer, and you always will be. It may seem strange for some, but you kept us going through some of the toughest times. You kept me going, even when I felt alone in the world. I still can't grasp that you are gone.

I remember how you developed a taste for lettuce, because were jealous of the iguana. I remember how if we got down at eye level and yelled, 'Scoochie!' you would throw your ears back and pull your belly along the carpet, scooting along with delight. I remember how we made you a unicorn costume for the San Diego Pug Rescue fair and you would get so excited every time we took it out that you would try to put it on yourself. I remember how when I got a loft bed, you would let me carry you up the ladder, and then jump into my arms to get down in the morning with complete trust of my abilities to catch you. I remember how your fur smelled, and what it was like to fall asleep in the afternoon with you on my lap, and wake up to find you still there. And I remember when the fence blew over in a wind storm, and we thought you were lost. But a week later, you came home.

Since you left us, I have been sleeping on the couch, with the door open, waiting for you to scratch at the door and announce that you've come back. Feet worn and weary, you'd lick my face with glee, your eyes telling the story of where you had been and what you had discovered. That you had your adventure, but you came back for us.

I know it is my turn to let you go. Someday, the four of us will walk the desert together again, and we will finally let you run free, with our blessing, in the Arizona foothills you so loved. But for now, I hope you will let me hold onto you a bit longer, until that time comes.

I will always love you, Asia bear.

You tell Arnold the Iguana to share his lettuce up there.

-M